Emotional intelligence at work: what it looks like in practice
Emotional intelligence is often described in abstract terms. Here is what it looks like on an ordinary working day.
Emotional intelligence is the ability to notice and manage your own emotions, and to read and respond well to the emotions of others. It affects how people handle conflict, give feedback and lead change.
It is easier to understand through examples than definitions.
Four areas, with examples
Emotional intelligence is easier to understand through examples than definitions.
Why it matters for managers
Managers set the emotional tone for their teams. A manager who reacts angrily to problems teaches people to hide them. A manager who stays calm and curious makes it easier for people to be honest.
In customer-facing roles, emotional intelligence also affects how staff handle difficult customers and complaints.
Can it be learned?
Yes. Like any skill, it improves with practice and feedback. Useful methods include reflecting on difficult conversations, asking for feedback on your impact, and role-playing situations you find hard.
A simple daily habit
At the end of each day, ask yourself: when did I feel most frustrated today, and how did I respond? Over a few weeks, patterns become clear, and you can choose different responses.
Four areas, with examples
- Self-awareness: you notice you are getting irritated in a meeting and recognise why.
- Self-management: you choose to pause rather than reply sharply.
- Social awareness: you notice a colleague has gone quiet after a decision and check in with them later.
- Relationship management: you raise a disagreement privately and calmly, and agree a way forward.
Key points
- Emotional intelligence covers self-awareness, self-management, social awareness and relationships.
- Managers set the emotional tone for their teams.
- It can be developed through reflection, feedback and practice.
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